Monday, November 03, 2008

10:42 on a Sunday night, and I told myself I'd write something, anything, so here it is in all its antithesis of glory. Brylee goes in tomorrow to get her blood counts checked and for a bone marrow extraction; the blood count (CBC's) to see if she's ready to go back in for round 5 of chemo. I doubt she will be, but we'll see; her #'s were still low on Friday, lower than we thought they would be, but that's OK, all part of the process, and still no fevers which is the important thing. We had a great time at the hospital on Friday, went to a Halloween party at the play room; the people at Kapiolani are so amazing it's, well, amazing. It's really humbling to see all these people dedicating their lives to helping others. yeah, they get paid, it's a job, but there's much easier ways to make a buck, and quite a few more bucks at that I would imagine. I can't see how you would be able to continue to do it if you didn't have a passion for it. The people that we've met, other patients, their families, staff, doctors, nurses, volunteers, all these people coming together to help our little girl get through what she's gotta get through, makes you happy to live in a society with an infrastructure intact that allows for such things.

Went to Kailua to go watch football with a buddy this morning and ended up hanging out with a bunch of old friends I hadn't seen in years; was a lot of fun. The time it does slip by. 12 years I've been living on this rock, and it's nice to see that some of the people I knew back in the beginning still hold me in their good graces, no reason they shouldn't, and no reason I shouldn't do likewise, but you do ponder sometimes whether you make an impression or an impact or anything one way or another with those you pass along on the grand journey. I've been continuously amazed the support and kind words and encouragement I've received from so many people, both from my distant & not so distant past. the past is a trip; you get so involved in the present, the immediate past is right there, but before you know it months become years become decades and suddenly these people are these apparent figments, but then their reality becomes a piece of your world, and they're still there for you, and you think, OK, you did something right, all these people that you kicked up dust with along the trail, they still got you, their memories of you are fond and they are happy to see your face again. and you are happy to see them.

ah the ramblings. I'm tired. I should go to sleep. and you know what? I think I shall. the kids and wife are asleep, the schedule is in place, all it would take is a short walk across the house, brush the teeth, turn off the still lingering electrical apparatus still humming away (must power the gadgets, feed us), off to dreamville so I can wake up & go pay the piper, or get the piper to pay me. the piper don't pay, alas, though, if I don't play. Pity, struth. was a good weekend. I get such a kick out my kids, it's ridiculous. they are so alike and so different. such little individuals, more so every day. I look in their eyes & see a tanker of love & a gallon of mischief (among 8 million other things, all beautiful); I see their mother, my wife, who holds it all together with such strength and love and regard and class and sheer yet casual determination; she'd never even consider putting forth anything less, to the point where I consider it possibly the societal norm, yet I know it's not, she's 99th percentile on that shit, I am convinced, and, yup, lucky boy, a lucky boy I am. go to sleep, lucky boy. good night. tell the sandman the jurk storr called, something about shrimp, art vandelay, he'll understand, he's in the biz. salud.