Friday, September 08, 2006

I’ll let Bill Simmons do the NFL, while I stick to the WAC.

Introducing: WAC football picks of the week (spread taken into account)

(Home team in Caps)

Idaho (+17) over WASHINGTON STATE

As bad as Idaho is, WSU is no prize either, and Idaho only lost by 10 point to Michigan State in East Lansing last week, so while I think they’ll lose, they should be able to make it at least respectable, and yes I actually just wrote that sentence.

SAN JOSE STATE (+10) over Stanford

SJSU only lost by 6 on the road at Washington last week, and Stanford ain’t much better than the Huskies (if at all better) and this ones in San Jose, which is actually only a 2 hour drive from Palo Alto, but still, screw the tree.

ARKANSAS (-29) over Utah State

This is a huge spread, but Utah State lost by 31 to Wyoming last week on the road, and Wyoming was coming off a 6-game losing streak from last season. Arkansas much better team than Wyoming, even though they got blown out by USC, they held on longer than I would have expected, and they’re pissed after getting blown out & at home.

New Mexico (-6.5) over NEW MEXICO STATE

NMSU finally got their first win in what must have felt like forever against a 1AA opponent. New Mexico actually LOST to a 1AA program AT HOME (although Portland State is a very good 1AA program, they beat Hawaii at Aloha Stadium a couple years back, and they are at Cal next weekend, which don’t think doesn’t terrify me for the sheer zero upside infinite downside factor of the whole thing). I think they bounce back and squash the Aggies, though, even on the road.

FRESNO STATE (+4) over Oregon

Fresno State is, I believe, severely underrated, and Oregon, although good and not getting a TON of respect, are a bit overrated, and people still don’t understand how hard it is to win on that Fresno field. This is Fresno, people, you think the populace has anything better to do on a Saturday than pack that stadium and get belligerent? I say they win outright, screw the spread.

Nevada (+14.5) over ARIZONA STATE

This spread is way too big. Nevada lost by 9 at Fresno. ASU looks good in the PAC10, but they don’t have much on the defensive end. Just a hunch, but I think if they win, it won’t be by more than 10.

Already played:

BOISE STATE over Oregon State (BSU won 42-14)

Boise State continues to roll. No surprise there.

Until next time, stay wacky, and don’t come bitching at me if you bet and lose, cuz I don’t condone betting, and I don’t condone losing, those things may or may not be illegal in your jurisdiction, and you all know that the police and Judge Johanssen always have your very best interests at heart, even while they’re screaming blood murder at an underground rooster fight at 2 in the morning. Just imagine though, in an imaginary universe, what would happen if you dropped $5 on each of these. Well, we’ll (I’ll) know next week. Gracias.

update: Saturday night

wow. I suck. 1 out of 6. so at 5 bucks a pop I'd be down 20 bones at this point. We'll let's (how's I) see how I do next week, maybe I can dig my way out of this hole and start building a fort. or, er, not.

update: Monday afternoon

ok, well, let's see if I can't do better this coming weekend. oddly, this defeat has made me even more determined to accurately predict the fate of WAC football, for good or ill. fyi bill simmons went 5-8 on the sunday NFL games. so someone betting $5 a pop on my picks would be down $20, and that same person would be down $15 on simmons' picks so far, not counting the monday contests. btw go raiders. aloha.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Just a little smidgen of antithesis of knowledge while I wait for, uh, the lowdown on the download. I know I’m not supposed to talk about fight club, but fuck it. I’ve become obsessed, I’m relearning and observationally becoming informed of that which was the 80’s and people talking to the beat of an 808. goddammit, first rule of fight club, and there I go fucking it up again. next thing I’ll be giving soap away when I can buy the cow at home. 2nd rule of fight club is understand that Steady B is in jail and the other guy he used to hang out with is on death row. Ruff city. They used to rap, as in rhyme, as in on time & real, uh, gude. Serially, tho, good. I now listen to 4 each steady b albums all day long and before this week I never knew the guy existed. Thanks, fight club! Now I will not talk about that which shall be never spoken again. of that don’t worry. Hey can’t stand yah, I mean, costanza, the train wreck called, you forgot your ticket. But farilly, if you need to know of and possess music that is a shitload of that which is beat suite in & of itself and should never be spoken of, I’m not saying I know anything, but go to this place. They’ll take care of you. Just when you see them in the Xerox room & they’re all beat up, you better shut the fuck up. Btw why didn’t anyone tell me about PKO? And another thing I learned in a totally different arena is that the incredible hulk used to shoot himself with gamma rays every time he wanted to change back & forth to & from bruce banner. You may now continue, once again, with your existence.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Waccin’ It - Week 1 in the Western Athletic Conference

Howdy pards. Wacky football action kicked off in your fave football conference. The one whose proud history and unparalleled excellence leaves you gasping for breath on a weekly basis.

I won’t even explain myself there. You should (don’t) know the sordid history. Ok I’ll explain a little bit. The WAC is, how do you say, ragtag? Reassembled annually? The dregs of modern NCAA 1-A society? A band of misfits thrown together to tackle the perennial grand poobahs of college football royalty? Yeah, sure, something like that.

Anyway, let’s break the week down, starting with the University of Hawaii, my better half’s alma mater and the home team.

University of Hawaii at Alabama - LOST

UH put up a damn good fight against a pretty game looking Bama squad, IN Alabama at the opening of their newly renovated and now packing over 90K stadium. They only lost by a touchdown, and the spread was, what, 17? Not bad, not bad at all, and a couple turnovers avoided, couple calls going the other way, hey, who knows, but the only real revisions of history come if you manage to take over the government, er, a government, and put an iron mask on and crush booweevils under your steel toed boot. Um, sidetracked.

Boise State vs. Sacramento St. – WON

Wow. Dan Hawkins must be pining for the fjords like a mofo right about now. After having jumped ship to the, admittedly, bigger budget, bigger name, bigger job at Colorado, his buffaloes got beat by 1-AA Montana State in his first game as head coach. OUCH. Anyway, Boise St. should be in good hands, cuz new coach whuthisname has been with the program like forevah, so it should be biz as uzhe (yoooj?), and this was a gimme game (against 1AA) on the blue field, but time will tell if Boise continues to be the class of the WAC (ding ding) or if Fresno state, UH, or Nevada will be able to claw them down off their perch at the highest level of the trash heap.

New Mexico State vs. Southeast Louisiana – WON

Wow. Nice work. This was New Mexico state’s first win in over a year, (they snapped the currently longest division 1A streak) as they did the big oh-fer last year. not sure what the story is with southeast Louisiana, but they must suck pretty bad (hey, they’re 1AA). For NMSU, a win is a win, even if it’s against the Sacred Heart Women’s lacrosse squad. Nice won, boys.

Fresno State at Nevada – WON / LOST

The only WAC intra-conference game of the week, these two squads are considered basically 2nd echelon under Boise state, the (pretty much) undisputed favorite to win the conference again. Either team could have won & it wouldn’t have been any kind of huge upset. Fresno pulled it out, so, hey, hats off. Pat Hill always seems to have his boys ready for war, so they could be dangerous this year. Both these teams should actually have decent years, along with UH and possibly Louisiana Tech (despite the thrashing by Nebraska), but time will tell, as it always does (except with Joan Collins).

Those were the main games of interest in my mind, NMSU only because of the losing streak snapped. San Jose State got beat at home (although it was pretty close) by PAC10 team Washington (who are the crap of the PAC10, at least apparently) Utah State got crushed at Wyoming, Nebraska demolished Louisiana Tech in Louisiana, and Idaho went to East Lansing and lost to Michigan State by only 10 points, which actually could almost be considered an odd type of unsatisfying victory.

So rest assured, the WAC still sucks. They went 2-5 against the non-WAC, but the two wins were against 1AA competition. Let’s see if anything can be done about all this. Until next week, then.

An abridged version of this idiocy appears in blogritics' weekly NCAA Tailgate Cleanup