Saturday, October 30, 2004


Hey yall. Yah, so, they showed the end of that game. Michigan won. I guess abc KINDA redeemed themselves, coming back for parts of the 2nd and 3rd overtimes, but still, massive amounts of respect lost, but, I mean, not like I was idolizing them in the first place.

Somebody I have idolized my whole life, on the other hand, called up with some news, the kind that ain’t so good. Here’s to hoping for the best, and I’ll be knocking on wood and praying and all that jazz that this deal is worked out to the most benevolent conclusion. It’s tough. It’s rough & tough. On me, on others, on others way worse than myself I’m sure, and, well, I’m bummed. Maybe it makes it easier to talk about crap like football games & drink bourbon at noontime to pass the time.

So that’s what’s up with me today. The weather’s crap & Mrs. P is off doing some etcetera acres type dillio for an art gallery, and art is important, so that’s cool, maybe I’ll take the dog for a walk, maybe I’ll take the bike for a spin. Nah. Too much beamitude on hand for that at this juncture already. Congrats, betty, looks like you get to go outside.

Why ask why, bud dry, all that shit. Sigh and a double ala mode. I hate when I actually have serious issues on my mind and for some odd reason decide to write shit here. Makes it hard to just be captain nonchalant and savoir fare when I’ve got decidedly important and serious stuff bouncing around the noggin. Well, the less said of that the better. Anyways, if you’re reading this, and you have any kind of oddly displaced or whatever kine feeling of attachment to me as a ghost writing scribbles on the walls of cyberville, than please take just a moment and give a shoutout to that higher being of which you subscribe to, and if there are none, then like, uh, say a prayer to your commemorative grandma moses Christmas plate. For what? That all is well with the loved one of mine of which I speak.

Gracias.



I just sent this e-mail to ABC:

hello -

i find it UNBELIEVABLE that you actually cut away from the finale of the MSU/michigan game today, a game with 3 minutes left, michigan down one touchdown & driving for a touchdown, a game i had sat & watched for 2 plus hours, to cut to the beginning of a piece of CRAP game between USC & WSU that within 2 minutes of kickoff was already 14-0 trojans.

is your whole sports department smoking crack?????????? i am so confused. this is the worst programming decision since heidi. i am speaking from the hawaii marketplace, so i don't know what you did on the east coast, but it is just unconscionable to make that switch. it is, unthinkable. i can't even fathom it.

what were you thinking????

and they're STILL showing it, as i type this, the usc-wsu game, which is a dud! what ever happened to waiting until the end of a game then switching?? isn't that the most exciting PART of the game, especially a CLOSE one????

please please please! give me some form of a reason for which this was done and explain to me how it is potentially not the most retarded move in the history of network television.

aloha-

keith pennyworth


update: It's now 21-0, USC, halfway through the first quarter. meanwhile, checking online, the michigan/msu game is in OVERTIME. They're still showing the USC game.

mickey mouse, I'm coming for your bitch ass. Pluto too. tell goofy to load the gat, cuz the rocketlauncher is aimed at your crib. dumbasses.



Hola. For reasons slightly out of my control I still be here. Si. It's true. I just got to go for a spin on a v-rod so no complainage factor shall be issued.

Ah, goliath, you crazy cat. I think it's cuz I always liked hawkeye. Good character. No superpowers, just a straight shooter (zing) and you know, he's like that "maverick" type dillio, like, shit, dunno, I mean, he's mr. attitude, but always gets the shit done. I dunno.

And he always was having problems with chicks, like issues going on back & forth, always fucking up in romance, dealing with various dillios, the constant inevitable comparisons to captain America, just cuz they were the two non powered dudes in the avengers, even though cap WAS imbued with the super soldier serum, I mean, it did make him the "ultimate" of what a normal human being could be, but it was still within the range of human achievement without reaching into the supernatural or superhuman or whatever the fuck you call it. Kinda like batman but politically polar opposite. Well, uh, not politically, I guess.

Hi there. I’m back home now. E-mailed this to myself. Yes it was so worth saving, God forbid it should fall into communist hands. Not that there’s anything wrong with communism. The point I was trying to make about batman and captain America was that they are both the high point of realistic human achievement yet one is for the establishment ie go red white & blue and one is hidden in the shadows getting grimey & world ideals rather than that which should be forwarded by the you knighted states of the pinta, nina, & santa maria.

Nighty night.



Friday, October 29, 2004




I think I’m getting a wee bit obsessive about this whole hawkeye as goliath dillio. I just find it SO fukn fascinating for some reason. How a guy could, first of all, become a superhero just cuz he’s good with bow & arrow, I mean, nothing original, really, all the way back to robin hood, and then green arrow with the jla, but the pure genius, the, just, guts in storytelling, is to call it like it is & say, “ya know? This guy’s gonna start thinking he’s not pulling his weight.” I mean, you got thor, a norse fukn god, iron man, fuckn the vision (RIP?) and, shit, a bunch of other superdudes, and you’re like, “hi, um, get out of the way guys & let me shoot this arrow at the man eating cuneiform monster. I'm sure if the hammer mjolnir and 5 billion megaton repulsor rays can't handle it, this glorified slingshot will probably do the trick, and in any event, i mean, he could put an apple on his head and we could play parcheezi if things get drastic.”

Granted, I am being overly critical of a time tested weapon of not so mass destruction, but you prolly get my point, prolly meaning 3% chance. As a super-archer, you might eventually start to feel like a giant pussy, pardon the pun, so then you get some giant juice from hank pym, cuz he’s in like his 5 zillionth incarnation and wa-la! You can turn into a giant. You can smash all kinds of shit, beat up helicopters, the whole 9.

And then you only do it a couple years and give it up & become bow & arrow dude again.

I could talk about this all day. yes, argentina, cry for me.



Thursday, October 28, 2004


Boyyyy howdy, mayne I din’t know so many fine peeps like, uh, liked me. I’m like sally field getting all vaklempt in this bitch. I mean, I’m serially waiting for the pig’s blood to come dumping down on my head outta nowhere. I promise to take it like a man, smile for the cameras, and proceed to the fotomat for reprints.

so now i'm ready to talk about the kree-skrull war. you know? with all the earth shattering info invoked therein, the most interesting part of it to me is that Hawkeye is Goliath. so human, the need to be super, to pitch in, to be big. i mean, hi, your power is to shoot arrows. kinda get a complex going. couldn't they give him like a giant bow & arrow? or couldn't it grow with him? hmmm. bear in mind that mixed in here is vision getting his first pimpish feelings towards the scarlet witch, hank pym retiring from supering it up for like the 1st (?) of like 83 dozen times, uh, tony stark beating mandroids and premonitions of armor wars, uh, rick jones? can't beat that. uh, the origin of the savage land? ok i'm prolly wrong on that count, but mebbe not. Still though, pick up that tpb like yer grill cheese on pumpernickel. I'd recommend you visit your fave library & cut out ma & pa kettle & their clanging register.

Ehhh, yah. So, uh, fuckn, um, in other news, sheez, talk about a, something or other. Looks like I’m gonna go check out some dj movie tonite, care of the jurk storr hookin up the ducks, so, I mean, I’m not sure if it’ll be like vip style or whut, I’m thinking caviar and ice cream, but like, fondued. Yah, ticket equalization modulistically.

Fark in a fark. The new green day is good. So is the new keith. Not that octo II, shizzle, that was just like an orderve. Hmmm, I’m thinking this is really stupid. Like jinx bathroom style. Fuck a style. Fuck a freestyle. Wait, no, never that. Ok, well, yah, sometimes. Um. Fuck a single? No, wait, fuck a 40 ounce.

If you’re wrong & unoriginal about something, what do you need to do next to jack the trifecta? I need to know this. For, uh, research.



So whuddup and ladatt and all that shite. So I’m NOT talking about that baseball shite. I’m NOT talking about, uh, fuck, I dunno, that’s the only superobvious thing, oh yeah, the election, not talking about that either. Uh, letsee, and I’m not talking about the avengers, cuz that would have been assumed by the pic, so that’s scratched, nor james bond, kool keith, batman, uh, Berkeley, all of which you might anticipate. So, uh, that leaves me with makers mark. Good bourbon. But even that if you’ve read every line you might discern to be that which I imbibed and do hence forth imbibe on special occasions ie eating pasta etc.

So that’s strictly out as well.

Sad to say since I ditched the links I’m like kinda over the whole bloggin dillie. I mean, I dunno, not over over, but like under over?? Sheesh. I still read blogs ya know. Mebbe yers. I do it via blo.gs. yup. It’s a fantarstic service of which you should avail yerself. So if you’re manically checking your referral logs (nothing wrong with that) and you see a hit from blo.gs it might be me. Or it could be the instapundit. Or it could be dick cheney, checking up on yer ass, making sure yer not like planning government overthrow or like eating a chocolate pudding pop or some shit like that.

Stranger things have happened.

Go tell muscle68 his blog doesn't suck. then come back and tell me mine does. er, wait, I mean it's qualitatively challenged.



Tuesday, October 26, 2004


Yo yo. I have to do a dillio today. I’m listening to some crunk ass shit that I din’t pay furr. It was acquired but not five finger stylee, promise. So, uh, it’s all crunked up. I mean, it’s like, shit, it’s like, they be yelling and getting crunk! They’re getting serially crunked up. That’s what’s so especially crunkish abooot it.

The funny thing about t-bone johanssen is that he is my brother from another mother. So, uh, never apologize for not blogging withstanding, sorry. Wait, no I’m not. Gotta let that shit age. It’s like a fine wine, you know, like boone’s or some shit like that, maybe it’s like a fine bottle of orange flavored cisco.

And then, uh, the ball hit the ceiling? The new kool keith, aka diesel truckers, finally showed in my mailbox, and it is off the chain, off the chain meaning good. Meaning, uh, highly intellectually stimulating but at the same time making you shake your ass in a posterior induced rambling direction.

I’m getting so irra’s about this stereo situation which I will not describe to you cuz actual info is so 1982. used to have an 82 ladatt van halen shirt. Hmmm, did you know there’s a remix of that slow motion song with wyclef on it? Ok. Now the ball, if it was like one millimeter or one mile from the ceiling has just seriously hit it at 8 billion miles an hour.

Souljah slim RIP. I mean, eh, I’ve discussed it before. How you gonna die and THEN get a hit record. So typical. I mean, maybe I should fake my own death, then my shit would be HOT, like burning up the streets, homeless people would be sneaking into the library to download that shit, like, hooking up parralelogram pookas to bypass internal security, the whole nine yards.