Tuesday, October 15, 2002

as my good buddy hosemonster once said, (and I paraphrase, don't sue me for libel), it's funny how life in the blog world works out sometimes. After a glorious week of praise and thanksgiving, I was removed from my perch as the featured link on the ultimate forum in the media world, tony pierce's busblog. It was like christmas at the orphanage, being so honored. I laughed. I cried. It might have been just about as g-style as I ever approached without actually being in Glendale.

The reason that it's like funny, and I'm not sure if it's funny weird or funny ha ha, is that it appears that at the same time my link was replaced with yet another fine blog as the featured blog o the moment in tony pierce-ville, I noticed he put up a little section on his sidebar wherein he linked to some of his posts from two weeks ago, two months ago, and six months ago.

One of the links listed under "six months ago" happened to be my very first appearance in the blogosphere (outside of the comments sections). It was my coming out party, and I didn't even have a blog yet. This was before alfred and berkeley joe and randy rhoads' ghost, before any of that stuff that is now legendarily lame. It was just me, kool keith, stalking the busblog comments sections.

I remember that day fondly, there was a slight bit of moisture in the air, which had dried out by 11 am. I was, even back then, reading the Malcolm X autobiography, which I actually just finished the very last word of this morning (holy shit, are the planets in alignment or WHAT?) Tony had written a post about dean martin with a picture of Sammy Davis Jr., and I recalled how Malcolm X had expressed his negative feelings about black people that conked, or straightened out, their hair. I mentioned it to Tony in his comments section and headed off for a phat Mexican lunch with the office crew. I had Carnitas. They were delicious. With guacamole and salsa and beans and rice which was nice. And two or three coronas, my boss was in a good mood, it was a good day, there were good vibes and the waves were smackin. Ok I don't know if the waves were smackin, but dang that sounded good didn't it?

So anyway, I get back to the office, a nice little beer buzz going on, and I head over to Tony Pierce land, and son of a goatless mother, Tony Pierce himself, supreme overlord of bloggerville, had answered my query in a blog entry, and even referenced, me, kool keith. I was like so honored that I put on my silver and platinum tiara and stripped down to my bikini and paraded around the skunkworks singing Miss America under my breath while taps played softly in the background.

Now it wasn't really 6 months ago, it was June 7 of this year. And exactly two weeks later, the very first day of this blog manifested itself. Now here I am, about a week away from my four month anniversary as a blogger, and I still suck about as hard as a frikken vacuum. But that is ok, cuz I'm good enough, I'm strong enough, and goddamm it, I've used this joke already. The cool thing, though, is I no longer have to explain myself at the end of a post that doesn't mean jack shit. Any of you that have hung around this long already know that these are the ramblings of a deranged lunatic talking out of the ulterior orifice. But, hey, as long as the royalty checks keep coming in. wait, what royalty checks? Alright, where's my fuckin agent? Fukn dead man walking boyz, get out your pitchforks cuz this hay needs bailin'.

Did you ever envision something in your mind that sounded like a good idea, and then you followed through, and you realized, dang that really really sucks? That's kind of like this blog entry. Every time I actually make a conscious planning effort and try to like map out what I'm gonna write, it blows. And when I just type and crap comes out, it shines. And when I hear a whiffle ball bat swing, I still duck and cover. Duck and cover. Stop drop and roll. Don't forget the fireblanket cuz it's funny. Ha ha, not weird. And weird. And really shitty.

Good day.