Posted 12:36 PM by Alfred

holy son of a goatless mother! Meesh blogged today. And she didn’t just blog, she has pictures. Snowy happy pictures with fun doggies and snowy snowness that look cold and fun. Chiggedy check check it.

Ok enuff happy stuff you sons of goatless mothers! I’m stinkin’ mad about something! Goddammit I’m so pissed off that I threw away milk today before the expiration date.

Nah, just kidding, I’m actually in a pretty good mood. See it’s just, when I’m pissed I try to put my best foot forward and improve my mood, so I was thinking if I’m in a good mood I should try to put my worst foot forward, and like act like a full on dick. Just get good and revved up and hot and bothered and like beat up a cat with a golf club. Something fun like that.

The opportunity has not really presented itself, however, and thus I am left with my good mood, and the attached lack of creativity and inspiration that usually comes with such occasional swings, and therefore I really have little of substance to say. There’s just nothing to bitch about.

Oh yeah! Now I remembered what pisses me off. Oh this guy, this fuckin’ guy, I’ve been meaning to rip him one on this blog for some time. That fuckin’ subway guy. Not Jared, I got no beef with Jared, good job Jared, no squabble up in the hovel, you aiight. It’s this NEW mofo that’s got me ready to strap on my gat and go to war. This Mr. “come on you guys, pizza for dinner again? Let me get you to subway for some real food.” That blonde guy that just thinks he’s SO fuckin cool. “Oh hi, I’m Mr. Subway cool guy, and you just suck so hard.” The way he talks down to that poor kid at the Burger Joint, and the way all the people in there follow him to subway like he’s some kind of glorified corporate pied piper. FUCK THAT GUY. And how he acts like he knows all the subway workers and calls them by name when he walks in with his harem of mindless zombies “Hi Jackie, are you gonna whip us up something good today?” “Oh yeah, fuckball whatever your name is, I’m gonna whip up a horsecock sandwich and shove it up your mothafuckin’ ass is what I’m gonna do, you big pile of donkeyshit!” Well that’s not what the subway worker says, she says something like “yeah, Mr. Joe, I’ve got the new turkey fuzz cheese doodle special and it’s dripping with delicious mustard ranch sauce and it’s only $5.99 with a bag of chips and an ice cold pepsi.” But you KNOW she wants to tell him off as referenced above. And the subway worker always has some glazed look in their eyes like they’ve been medicated with some form of mind-controlling substance in order to spread the demonology of what this fuckwad is spitting.

So other than that Subway guy, all is well.

Proceed with your day.

Thank you.

PS – I didn’t edit this after typing it cuz just thinking about that subway guy and his attitude has me really steamed now. I’ve gotta go beat on some skunks. So please excuse any grammatical errors and or references to Satanism that may have leaked into my prose.

PPS – I just came up with a saying. “Hypocrisy is the right of the aged.” That’s what they’d have you think. What a load of horseshit. “oh be patient with the old, they can’t help that they’re racist and bible-thumping-but-at-the-same-time-wishing-injury-to-people-that-they-don’t-like, and they can’t help it that they think the younger generation are a bunch of fuckin idiots solely concerned with doing the “herky-jerky.” People of the older slant have just as much duty to respect other people as everybody else. Ok this in not a generalization about all aged, it’s one aged person, and dizam, I guess it’s ok, he’s an old feller, and he can’t help it that he’s fucked in the head.

But yes he can. Jeez. I’m sick of old people using their experience and the fact of “how it was in their day” as a crutch to carry on the same old bullshit of previous times. Get with the flow Joe or get off the bus.

PPPS – Anal vocalizations from this locality are at an enormously high frequency today. Not in the sense of anal retentive but that I’m talking out of my ass, for those that require an explanation on such matters.

PPPPS – I saw the preview for the Daredevil movie when we saw James Bond last weekend and despite my dislike for Ben Affleck, it looks pretty fukn BADASS. Oh and James Bond was aiight.

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