Monday, September 22, 2003

so there’s one thing I really must emphasize before we all move on as, you know, like, a contingent. Listen carefully, thinking caps on compatriots in the struggle. Hear me now & listen to me later, these tidings shall bring comfort and/or joy depending on your mindstate at the moment of reception and willingness to adapt to new surroundings and or conceptual platforms.

I just received a phone call from “el Mercado jerkero”. Aka the jurk storr. Turns out I’m their #1 best seller. The interesting part about it was that I was actually expecting it to be the ocean calling, as I was anxiously awaiting some pertinent information regarding some shrimp interests that my holding company has in various ports of the Indian Ocean.

But it was not to be.

I am not at liberty to divulge specifics about the conversation, but I will say this. There is a power struggle going on here at ultrablognetic enterprises. Keith and myself were hoping that it wouldn’t come to this, but Joe has forced our hand, to the extreme levels that vandalous behaviour has been necessitated.

Attorneys have been contacted. Our accounting firm of Fackelstein and Schwartz have already begun purging his authoritativeness from all books of record and soon this venture will be the sole property of personages by the name of the other kool keith and the non butlering Alfred pennyworth, both esquire, neither junior, fully within our faculties and acknowledging our rights and options in this alarming new stage in the career of literary freedom.

Uh, guys?

Joe, seriously, you need to leave. Like now.

Uh, but I brought those bootleg 60’s batman dvd’s. and I’m going back to mi casa, popping em in, lining up some beam and cokes, and madden 2004 will be like the ceremonial in between episode fesitivity.

Basically while you’re wondering if the dynamic duo are going to be burned alive by catwoman’s giant george foreman grill and magnifying glass, you’ll be hitting L2 and dropping Mike Vick’s passing icons and running roughshod through the defensive line. Kapeesh?

IF I am reinstated and you relinquish all opportunities to jack my grip.

You drive a hard bargain Berkeley Joe, you goatless bastard.

Done and done. Thanks for reminding us of everything you bring to the table. Despite your foibles and wherewithalls, we couldn’t run this shit without your bitch ass, and ya know, we were just fucking with you anyway.

No you weren’t.

yeah, ok.