Posted 11:05 AM by Alfred

I’ve got this one bizarre (fat guy from D12 – Eminem’s group) line swimming through my head over & over & over again this morning: “dreams of fucking a handicapped bitch” – can’t remember how the rest of the verse goes. Maybe it’s cuz I’ve been reading wolves of the calla, Stephen king’s fifth installment of the dark tower, like a bastardized rat crapsterpiece on crystal methanphetamines mixed with jolt cola. The other line I can’t seem to shake from my medulla is from the same feller, and goes “gimme this seven thousand, and take these cheeseburgers.”

Ok let’s analyze this. Or not. Or, I got an idea, do a half ass job of it which gives us no real answers whatsoever. The handicapped bitch bit has gotta be from the book, cuz there’s this one character who’s in a wheelchair, but she’s like a badass amputee, a gunslinger. Plus she has multiple personalities. I’ll leave it at that and let you read it yourself someday. Start at the first one though, don’t just jump into the fifth chapter, unless, that is, you really really want to.

As for the 7 grand for the cheeseburgers, maybe it’s representative of my fascination with lopsided deals, which I didn’t know was inherent in my personality but so be it.

I did not see kill bill 2 this weekend although it’s definitely on my radar. Instead I went to the 2nd most successful film of the weekend, the punisher. It was aiight. Had it’s moments. Uh, when did Rebecca romijn soon-to-be-not stamos become like a legit film star that’s in like everything? Not that I’m complaining, she’s a serviceable actress in many factorials, but, still. Eh. Travolta was purty good as like some overacting villain, although, nah, he didn’t overact too bad, I take it back. Takesies allowed in this game, Donnie.

Oh yah, and there was one piece of cinematic violence therein which I had never seen. A guy getting stabbed in the throat, up through his head, and his mouth’s open, so you see the knife going through into his head through his mouth. Good stuff. Thank you mr. director. So end result? Punisher worth your $6.50 or whatevs you pay. Or just jack it off of a satellite. Either way, you’ll be entertained. I ain’t saying you’ll learn the meaning of Pythagorean philosophy or anything, but eat a hot dog and gargle some popcorn and sizzle a fizzle, and you’ll thank me in the morning.

Hmmm. It’s, like, early. Early bird gets the worm. Late bird gets the girlie with the 2 dollar perm. Tell me what song that’s from cuz damn I can’t remember. I think I know who dropped it, but not where when or why. One hint, I think he got shot in the head in that one movie with janet & tupac. Could be wrong. Just goes to show, they always fuck you at the drive through, um, drive-in. Aloha.

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