Posted 2:27 AM by Alfred

Yo yo I don’t know why I’m still up. I had to get up like at 6 am on a Saturday to go werk which is the pile of donkey ass of all piles seeing as how I ain’t had a single day off since getting in Monday nite from a pair of long ass plane rides and 4 hour layover. Yah, whining, sorries. Wait, no, fuck that, only one sorry. Ok two.

Fukn gmail takes all day long to send pics to buzznet. I’m thinking I’m the biggest pile cuz I have buzznet but don’t even have a digital camera. You prolly hate me now. I just take pics that other people send me, usually from circumstances from which I was involved, you know, they’re being nice and sending me pics to remember shit, and I post it on the internet like a vandalous vandal, fukn mc ren style.

Oh that and I find comic books pics on the internet. Jesus what a tard.

Oh the gmail finally finished sending one. Ok I’ll send another. Just cuz I, um, shit, I don’t know why. Cuz I’m a donkey dirk digglin dig dug donkey kong addict? Fukn stupid.

Ok, gmail is taking like 83 astromedallion equivalent of years sending another pic. Yup. Um, except the pic’s not stupid, you are. No I am. No you are. Bah. Um, humbug.

So yah, you might think it’s really lame to like post pics from LAST year’s vacation when you just got back from THIS year’s vacation, but that’s just the way that the jurkstorr operates and if you don’t like it you can have your deposit back prick-yard. Yah! Prick-yard. That’s my new saying. If you hear someone use that, fuck that, I seriously just made it up, have never heard it, and, fuck, I’m going to the patent office tomorrow.

Fuck I’m tired. I’m going to bed.

Dood, did I tell you I was having the most insane dreams all night last night, and I knew I was dreaming, and they were nightmares, so in my dream I was trying desperately to wake myself up, but I couldn’t, like, I knew it was a dream, you dig, but I couldn’t wake up, (kind of like that KRS-1 song where he's a blunt) but at least I knew I was in a dream, so I could give myself super powers, cuz shit, I saw dream warriors, like I could put an invisible shield around myself and fly, but so could the vampire bitches, so, it was still kinda scary.

So eventually I was able to wake up, or at least I THOUGHT I had woken up, cuz I was in my house and in my bed, and then I go out into the living room, and there’s like people wandering around in this room beyond my kitchen that, like, doesn’t exist, and I’m like “what the fuck are you doing here?” and I forget what they said, but then I realized that I had mindfucked myself and was not awake but actually still asleep.

I did this like three more times, falsely waking up in my old apartment, my grandparents’ old house, and my parents’ house I think, and every time I was fooled, but only for a minute, and I was trying to roll around on the ground in my dream hoping I would roll out of bed and wake myself up.

Thankfully my alarm went off. Fuck I’m freaking myself out now, cuz my dog just walked in and scared me, I thought it was the demons again.

No more whiskey, thai food, and revenge of the overfiend before sleepy-time.

Ok now I’m really going to bed. but not before reading a little more american psycho. hopefully that won't have an adverse effect on my nocturnal subconscious adventures. aloha.

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