Posted 1:14 PM by Alfred

if you even knew the shit I do you’d prolly fall asleep like all over yourself, hmm, does that imply drool, or just, like, the metaphorical (?) essence of you own slumber? Interesting. Ok, not. But, let me tell you something. ok don’t. fargeddaboot it. Oh yah, I forgot to tell you that bing is on a European stint, currently eating assloads of assfood in paris. That’s not like it sounds. She somehow became immersed in food that tastes like ass, which I find dubitable (?) as I grinded like a gran campeon during my time in beret central. is it appropriate to say dubitable (?) even though you're not, like, implying disbelief, but merely shock & awe?? or is that only cool when you're fraggin restless natives? anyway, back on topic, me loves them outdoor café style dillios where you sit & drink beers and they bring you like a million food shite and you split a meal with yo luvved one, like a full dillio (?) and they basically give you the hookup with all kine extras cuz you grease the dood’s palms not with extra moolah but, you know, your jennay say kwah stylees, well, plus you overtip on top of that cuz you’re a dumb American and don’t realize French don’t tip for shit and the word has got around that you’re the #1 stunnah and thereby they fly to, uh, hmmm, maine (?) and get the best lobster for your lobster bisque. Not to say I’m more deserving than you of the finest finers but you know, they don’t call me the miner 49er for nothing. Ok they do. Not call me that. The miner 49er. And don’t even get started on how that chick fell into the brine & I wasn’t a swimmer, cuz it’s a fucked up story.

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