Posted 1:55 PM by Alfred

via associated press

Lakers complete one of worst seasons ever

..."This season is a step," Lakers star Kobe Bryant said following a season-ending 106-103 loss at Portland. "It seems like a very small step, but it's a step."

The Lakers' 34-48 record was their third-worst since they moved to Los Angeles in 1960, and they finished behind the Clippers for only the third time in the last 27 years...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

And now I will bask in the patheticness of what an achievement it is, to beat your crosstown rivals. Yes. We beat them, by sucking just a little less. Sad but true, the terms of our not-so phyrric victory. when scraps are all you get, you gotta be happy when you get a big scrap, yes, you know what I mean, of what I speak, I see it in your eyes, you, me, we’re on the same page, fuck all those other people, it’s people like you & me that know what’s really going on on this crazy marble.

Or do you? Now I’m wondering, you’re tricking me. Hmmm, suddenly this is all very haphazard and extremely unsettling, you don’t know what I know, about the cosmic catharticness on the crystal orb of cittorakk do you? Of course you don’t.

this is your nba championship, clip fans. savor it. it's... disgusting, isn't it? nod your head. congratulations and get back in your cage of doomed iniquity. ie: hopelessness. when it comes to clipper incredulity, or, rather, incredibility. suitably. (hope lives eternal), so spoke atticus fitzgerald, founder of our movement. 1853. my great great grandfather was there. he was, uh, 37 years old. i have lithographs. don't fuck with me.

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