Posted 12:23 PM by Alfred

simpleton is really running a very interesting blog.

All two of you, (yes I see you, Frank), please rush over there & peruse its wares.

By interesting I mean something other than blah blah blah blah blah and like some other shit in there that twiggles the innards of some brains.

Jesus Christ, don’t ask me to explain it. Wait, I mean, holey moley, don’t axe me to elucidate. Thou shalt not and all that jazzey ola.

I wuz gonna erase it, but just cuz you erase it doesn’t mean that it never came out of the keyboard, right.

I’m really gonna do this book thing btw too. It’s the blog book (yes, BO-ring) not the like, book, book, you know, like novel dillio.

I’m afraid I won’t be able to do the innernet puhlishing kine with that. I may, but may not, I think once it’s done being written, by me, in the year 2020, I’ll just spend the rest of my life futilely trying to sell it to publishers or get agents interested in it until about 3 days before I keel over and THEN I’ll publish it via café press or robot monkey, which will be the then current idiom of which such things are done.

So you’ll get to read it, or maybe your grandkids will. By then it will be so outdated they’ll much rather play with their mister guava head, by far the hottest toy that summer. I’m currently spending way more time on that venture than anything involving writing. I mean, crap, didn’t you know that writing is more 1982 than 1982 itself?

The only thing is that in 2020, 1982 might be in again. shit, I may need to rethink this whole thing. Focus groups, strategy meetings, the whole shebang, ok, call my lawyer, we’re going back up to that courtroom dressed full to the tees in Armani, I will not have my magnus opus on the backburner just because some kid named sam I am living in my throat and imagining freaky twins in abandoned hallways wants to reinvent 70’s anthropomorphization at the expense of third rate literature.

---